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| Thorin never knew just how wrong he could be! |
I'm subscribed to the Australian site MamaMia, which is basically the online version of a Women's Opinion Magazine but with a more diverse range of topics. I'm one of the 'occasional blokes' who reads the odd article that catches my attention. So when I see a headline like Why all women should grow a beard at least once, how can I not read it?
Now, if the article had been about women actually growing beards, that may have been interesting for the social/cultural implications but it was actually about all women growing out their pubic hair at least once in their life instead of going bald down there. When did growing pubes become a thing instead of just something that happens to you?
The article's author, twenty-something, Laura Cordero, apparently has been removing her pubic hair since the first once dared to appear and, until now, had never let her, 'beard' (her term) grow out. OMG!
OMG because she described it as a beard and now I'm imagining vaginas with little eyes and a nose above their cute bushy beards... and... when did 'bald' become the norm, and why, in this day and age, are men (in her article) getting blamed for the bald vagina?
Just as a footnote - yes I said 'vagina' and not 'vulva' (for anyone that just happened to read the numerous corrections in the original article's comments by anatomy nerds). Get over yourselves. The mainstream uses vagina as a generic term for that entire region. You know it, I know it. Vulva is obsolete to all but doctors, anatomists and other people that like to scoff at mainstream ignorance.
First, feminism happened long before bald vaginas became a thing. If there's one thing that women have full control over it's to go bald or not. Sure there are guys (or girls depending on your preference in partners) that prefer bald but really, there are people who prefer blondes, Asians, big eyes, long legs etc. etc. you are not a menu made up of what other people prefer. Do what you prefer for yourself.
Maybe porn popularized the bald look but I have a sneaking suspicion the beauty industry perpetuated it as another service they could charge people for - more than it being a male preference. Most men, I imagine, couldn't care less and those who do, probably use a lot of 'product' and may even be bald down there themselves.
That said, in a week where Australian Journalist, Tracey Spicer gives a TED talk bitching about how long women spend on their daily beauty routine, growing your public hair is surely a no brainer for saving just a little bit of time? Who's going to know at the office or any other place of business where keeping your clothes on is a requirement?
Until I read Laura's article it never occurred to me that a shaved or unshaved vag was a criteria that some people have for what they like in a partner? I've personally never met any woman and wondered if she was bald down there. (Too busy reminding myself that those aren't her eyes and I should probably look a bit higher - I don't get out much!)
But what's even more surprising to me is that 'hairy' is now a thing and 'bald' seems to be the norm? Surely that's a product of Generation Y on-wards, who've been told they can be or do anything they want by Gen X'ers? Apparently they've embraced bald.
I once heard a Big Brother contestant complain about how a hairy vagina was gross and thought she was the vain exception not the rule. I'd like to say 'who would have thought?' but honestly how a women's magazine can write a whole article on whether or not to grow out your pubic hair is beyond me?
I'm also wondering if Laura, who professed that beards weren't for her, would grow hers back if some guy said beards were sexy? Maybe she should discuss it with Cameron Diaz, who's all in favour of pubes - apparently.
Such a dilemma!